When the chemistry is undeniable, it might be difficult not to jump each other’s bones on the first date. And while there’s nothing wrong with having sex right off the bat, there are some major benefits to holding off, at least for a little while.
We’re not suggesting you enforce abstinence until marriage (that’s completely up to you!), but if you’ve been having bad luck in the dating game lately, you may want to consider waiting to be intimate until you really see the relationship going somewhere. You might even be surprised at the ways it sets you both up for success in the long run. If you’re not yet convinced, check out nine reasons delaying sex can actually help a new relationship.
IT’LL HELP YOU FIND OUT IF THEY LIKE YOU FOR YOU AND VICE VERSA.
With sex often in the way of things, it’s harder to tell whether the person is in it for you or for the physical stuff. When you eliminate that distraction entirely, you’re able to filter out the wrong people and find out who thinks you’re worth waiting for.
YOU’LL BE ABLE TO BUILD A STRONG FOUNDATION.
Now that you know that he or she is with you for the right reasons, you can continue to get to know each other on a deeper level. Your relationship will be built on trust, friendship, romance, and other key qualities rather than sex. Once you two do begin getting physical together, you’ll already have this base that will help make intimacy even more fulfilling.
IT’LL MAKE YOU BOTH MORE APPRECIATIVE OF THE PHYSICAL SIDE.
Because you both have to restrain yourselves, other physical interactions that are usually taken for granted will seem more meaningful. You’ll be able to appreciate holding hands and kissing, for example, that much more.
IT’LL HELP BUILD UP EXCITEMENT.
Sexual tension will be inevitable, but it also makes things more fun. The tease will only make the end result more satisfying and explosive. Plus, knowing that the two of you have to keep your hands off of each other will make the most innocent things drive you crazy.
YOU’LL SEE EACH OTHER FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE.
If you call each other up at one in the morning, you know it won’t be for a booty call. It’ll be because you genuinely want to talk and be in each other’s company. You’ll learn about their interests, personality, and who they are beyond the surface level. What’s left is what you get.
IT’LL FORCE YOU TO GET CREATIVE WHEN IT COMES TO AFFECTION.
You’ll have to woo and be wooed in other ways. Without physical interactions (aside from the more innocent stuff) to imply some of your feelings, you’ll be required to be more romantic.
IT’LL MAKE YOU FOCUS ON THE RELATIONSHIP.
Your connection will be that much more authentic, preventing either of you from doubting your relationship. Without having to guess whether or not it’s all about the sex, it’ll be clear that you’re both in it to win it.
IT’LL PLACE MORE IMPORTANCE ON EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT.
Without the physical side to take away from what really matters, all that remains is you and them and nothing else. You’ll know that you can rely on and trust one another because what you’ve established together is a genuine partnership, not a sexual one.
WHEN YOU DO FINALLY HAVE SEX . . .
It will be amazing. Sex on the first date isn’t always the best and can often be an awkward experience because you hardly know the person. But sex won’t make or break things since you’ve already established a connection that’s worthwhile. On top of the built-up excitement and a relationship based on emotions over hormones, the final moment will be so much more fulfilling for the both of you.
